Egypt Will Have to Wait

The events in Egypt reveal a terrible truth to us, conspirators: Nobody rules the world! How is that? What about the U.S.? It looks the U.S. does not rule the world, either.

The business has been going out little by little. It was clear with the Ukraine: Ushchenko was an American man, married to the agent of influence; American ambassadors hand diplomas to SBU graduates, Atlanticists land in Crimea and my friends from the peninsula Russian Community throw them triumphantly off into a warm Black Sea. The Georgia example is even better.

When Kyrgyzstan was brewing, there was no end to the experts’ surprise; was Otunbayeva appointed by America? She, of course, in the spirit of a primitive dissident, adores America, but America did not expect to see this lady rule in far away Kyrgyzstan. We do not need WikiLeaks to understand that while the Americans were busy bargaining with Bakiyev for the base, just as we were, the situation in Kyrgyzstan was not controlled by any of us at the time.

Then Tunis happened. What’s the deal? Tunis is tiny; what could have happened there is dark and of little importance to business. Anyway, Hurghada is not there. So what’s there to worry about?

Now, Egypt, big and generously vested in with our beloved Hurghada, has put a riddle forth. Who is behind the revolution in Cairo? There are plenty of alternatives. The only clear thing is that it is not us; we lavishly financed something in Egypt, but not the chaos. We travel there to have some rest from our own chaos.

There is, certainly, another type of bullhead who still insists the U.S. is behind the revolution. But the commentators need to turn themselves inside out to prove it. For example, in this way, new power centers are forming in the world: China and India, etc. A zone of instability and weakness needs to be created by the old world, along with the new one, to withstand the newly formed power centers — a zone of constant danger. That is why they have designed a mess in Egypt, which is promising to spill over to Algeria, Syria, Yemen and see next on the list.

A little kickshaw makes it harder to believe. What about Israel, a loyal ally to the U.S. (and vice versa)? What is Israel to Americans? It is one-fourth of their people who live there. Don’t they have compassion for them? It is possible that, as a result of Egyptian nights, the darkness will come upon Yershalaim (Translator’s note: From Master and Margaret by M. Bulgakov, means Jerusalem). Much more radical Islamic powers will emerge to govern all the aforementioned Arab countries because of the mysterious plans attributed to the U.S. It is going to be hard on Israel, for sure.

However, a conspirator’s thought again demonstrates its sophistication; it will end in a bad way, some say. What is it about that? In general, some people in America have become fed up with the “Israel Project”, which has always been engaged in everlasting, suffocating war with all its neighbors. No wonder Hussein Obama, a secret Muslim, at the beginning of his career, had so obviously been sending friendly signals to the Islamic world. So, Israeli leaders had their worries, and not in vain. What will happen if we are really facing a colossal turn in world politics, with a tectonic change of priorities?

Unfortunately, to answer the question precisely of what side America is going to take is hardly possible before the conflict in the radical Islamic world enters a military phase. Of course, we would like to peek into the future to learn who will get the support of the Sixth fleet. First, the question remains only rhetorical. Second, it would be better to prevent shootings and fires, for the sake of humanity. That is why a progressive world community has appointed Egypt with an experienced ElBaradei as a future leader. On the other hand, there is a resistant Mubarak, the graduate of Frunze Summer Academy, who loyally served at the Camp David retreat (because of it, our Hurghada and Sharm el-Sheikh emerged, and a lot of thanks for that, as there are only 12 kilometers of beach line in Israel; we will not fit in there), and he immediately placed a peaceful atomic scientist under house arrest. Instead, Mubarak suggests Omar Suleiman, a strong former intelligence serviceman, and a follower of his courses of the fantastic enrichment of one group of people and the wild poverty of others; loyalty to America and Israel; mendicancy; and slow waiters.

It is not an established fact that this will satisfy the beneficiaries of the Cairo revolution. The “Al-Ikhwan-Al-Muslimun.” The Muslim Brotherhood is a strong, case-hardened movement of iskrovec (Translator’s note: the name of a member of a revolutionist movement that published the newspaper “Iskra” in the 1900s, funded by Vladimir Lenin), like fundamentalists that have been waiting for their momentum since 1928. El-Sadat beat them and didn’t finish. Mubarak a fortiori. Though this party in Egypt (and in Syria) is banned, its supporters used to sneak into Parliament under the guise of being independent candidates. And the “Brotherhood” is a power that clearly stated that Camp David means nothing to them. The power that has nothing to do with democracy or progress, let alone the Western way or, furthermore, the power that’s quite hostile to them. Now, there is tension in the air; a nuclear explosion and the body of a female activist, beaten to death with stones, are expected. Why would the Americans and the Western Europeans bring them to power?

There can only be one answer, and it is far from being in the spirit of reflections on a new “center of instability”. Nobody has reflected on them yet. They just came along in the conditions of a fallen hegemonic world and the fall of a bipolar world that followed. Their ideology is tenacious of life because it finds its reflection in people’s souls. Not everybody in the world is attracted to the absence of religion, consumerism, libertarianism and a legalized infamy, and not everyone wishes to be an eternal slave of the rich (tourists, do not relax), not everybody wants to stay second-rate at the great world fair. Many cherish hopes of ruling a bit themselves.

Of course, there is another opinion that the “Brotherhood” will come to power not in this episode but in the next one. When the ElBaradei-Suleiman coalition fails to change anything, a second wave of darkness and disappointment will cover Egypt. Time will show; yesterday, Suleiman had already talked to the opposition that had come out from underground.

For now, I have an easy question. What does it mean for us? I am not saying that we should expect similar excesses in Central Asia. Indeed we should; it is a fact. The most important conclusion for us is that if the owner of forty billiard’s worth of the wealth of Mubarak, who began to rule Egypt 30 years ago, had just a bit of a self-preservation instinct and a tiny little bit of sanity, he would not just put the “Brotherhood” behind bars, which would be a useful thing to do. He would notice that the economy in his country is entirely resource-based, that his people are angry and live in poverty, that he is ready to leave a sacred tourist in a desert without water or a camel for a dollar, and that graduates have to find somewhere to work. He would notice that the envy in the eyes of a dirty boy who saw somebody eat a piece of bread undermines the regime better than a diamond cutter, and that the world is ruled by new political and communications technologies, not by cannons and pipelines.

… It looks like, however brave as we are, we are not going to Egypt yet, considering that a hospitable Turkey is already rubbing its hands in anticipation of a summer wave from our side. I would suggest something different: Let’s travel across our country. And what about Egypt? Egypt will have to wait. Let’s admire our country. It is very practical, especially with the elections coming soon. Here are native sharks for you, big business sharks. Here is deceit around every corner. Here are scam and corruption, financial pyramids, GKO (Government Short-Tern Commitments) and Mavrodi.

And Mubarak… What about Mubarak? He used to dye his hair and look in the mirror. Hmmm, what a mighty oldie! Now he has to use all his remaining strength just to not allow some excessive bloodshed, watching how various political powers are fighting for the genie he has let out of the bottle.