Herman Cain, or How to Electrocute a Campaign

Is Herman Cain rising a bit too high in the polls? In RealClearPolitics’ last barometer (which puts together the most current polls), the most unlikely Republican contender is tied with the favorite, Mitt Romney, each with 23 percent of intended votes in the primaries. But Herman Cain now seems to be doing everything possible to fall from the podium, throwing out blunder after blunder, as if to remind everyone that his presence is due to a casting error and that he is not even close to being a serious candidate for the presidency.

Having already suggested this summer that moats should be built around the Mexican border and filled with alligators to dissuade illegal immigrants, Herman Cain proposed this weekend that an electric fence be built around that same border. “It’s going to be 20 feet high,” he explained during a meeting in Tennessee. “It’s going to have barbed wire on the top. It’s going to be electrocuted, electrified. And there’s going to be a sign on the other side that says it will kill you.” [http://blog.faithinpubliclife.org/2011/10/herman_cains_electric_fence_jo.html] During another meeting in Tennessee, Herman Cain specified that the sign would be bilingual, in English and Spanish. Faced with outcry, Herman Cain then assured everyone that he was only joking. “That’s not a serious plan,” he explained Sunday on NBC. “That’s a joke. I’ve also said America needs to get a sense of humor.”

Electrocuting illegal immigrants is far from being Herman Cain’s only “joke.” In a recent interview on fundamentalist channel CBN (Christian Broadcasting Network), the candidate for the White House also warned: “When they ask me who’s the president of Ubeki-beki-beki-beki-stan-stan, I’m going to say, ‘You know, I don’t know. Do you know?’ And then I’m going to say, ‘How’s that going to create one job?’”

All of these eccentricities reinforce our personal suspicions about Cain’s candidacy, which seems to us to be designed to show that African-Americans also have a place in the Republican Party, to suggest that the attacks against Obama had nothing to do with racism, and thus turn a certain number of African-American voices against Obama during the next presidential election. Having more than fulfilled his mission with his new position as a leader in the polls, Herman Cain may be now seeking to discredit himself. … This beautiful theory, however, has two major faults: 1. No one can guarantee that Cain’s excesses will not make him rise even further in the polls, and 2. If his goal was to pick up African-American votes, what’s the use in alienating Latinos, who will not really appreciate that he wants to electrocute their relatives or throw them to reptiles …?

In any case, thanks to Cain, we’ll know why we should watch the next debate between all of the Republican contenders this Tuesday night on CNN: Will the former head of Godfather’s Pizza try to strengthen his breakthrough and put on a more presidential suit, or will he also suggest that we put alligators to work in Washington?