How Do Americans Hold Weddings?

Published in Guangming
(China) on 5 June 2012
by Qisheng Xu (徐启生) (link to originallink to original)
Translated from by Yuxi Zhao . Edited by Gillian Palmer.
A wedding in the U.S. can be held in grand or austere style, depending on the couple’s financial situation rather than any desire for competition. Americans don’t believe that owning property is a prerequisite for marriage. Neither a groom nor his family has the onus of preparing a honeymoon house. There is also no rule in the U.S. that says the groom’s and bride’s families must be on an equal economic level. Whether the bride or groom owns a house or car does not determine whether a couple gets married or not; in fact, two lovers can get married as long as they love each other. Additionally, parents seldom support children in purchasing a house, despite their good economic standing. Quite a few young Americans rent houses after they are married. A young couple supports themselves after the wedding. When they have considerable savings from working for several years, the couple will then consider purchasing a house.

According to a statistical report from the American Wedding Association, the average cost of an American wedding is $22,000 (approximately 138,000 RMB), and weddings cost Americans $72 billion annually. Most Americans prefer to hold weddings in June, a custom which is said to be related to Roman mythology. The English word June originates from Juno, the goddess in charge of love and marriage. Therefore, most lovers want to get married in June.

Unlike the Chinese tradition of a groom's family hosting the wedding, a bride's family covers the cost of the wedding in the U.S.. A bride spends mainly on a diamond ring. Since Americans value weddings, the expense of a wedding is considerable, including $500 for rental of the church or wedding space, $2,500 for rental of the reception space, $4,000 for a 100-person dinner, $2,000 for photography, $1,500 for a band, $750 for flowers, $500 for cake, $5,000 for wedding rings and $500-$1,200 for a mid-price bridal gown. Americans prefer to buy the bride’s dress. After the wedding, the bride will preserve the dress, which will be a special present for her daughter’s marriage. The food served in the banquet is relatively simple. According to the report, 38 percent of the cost of a wedding is the buffet, 34 percent goes towards the comparatively formal banquet and 28 percent merely provides the cake, cookies, and beverages. The size of a wedding varies. A wealthy person’s wedding can cost over a million U.S. dollars, sometimes even more than $10 million. For example, former U.S. President Bill Clinton spent more than $3,000,000 for his only daughter, Chelsea.

Americans are concerned about usefulness when preparing wedding gifts. Gifts normally aren’t very expensive. If you receive an invitation to your friend’s wedding, you should attend the wedding on most occasions. Guests who attend the wedding don’t give monetary gifts directly. Rather, he or she will get a gift card to a store or mall so that the new couple can pick what they want, if guest has no idea what kind of gifts the couple needs. The amount on a gift card is determined by your financial capability. If you lack financial resources, you can present a greeting card.

A common practice in the U.S. is that, when a couple is preparing for the wedding, they will put a list of goods which they like in the computer system or on the website of a store — normally Macy’s, the largest department store in the U.S. — and then inform their guests to pick gifts for them from the website. Generally, the couple will indicate on the invitation that they have chosen goods found in certain malls or kitchen appliance stores, with a website address to the list. Friends can purchase gifts based on their relationship with the couple and on their financial conditions. When a guest purchases a gift, his or her name will be immediately entered into the registry. It is thus clear on the list that who should purchase which kind of gift. Normal guests spend approximately $100 (approximately 630 RMB) on a gift.

Due to the high expense on weddings, a growing number of Americans will consider the possibility of accidents during weddings, such as one partner suddenly changing his or her mind, family intervention, extremely bad weather conditions and other factors that may cause the cancellation of a wedding. A couple therefore will buy wedding insurance to cover the loss if a wedding is canceled. Insurance can cover photography, suits, gifts and rings. The amount of wedding insurance can range from $155 to $550. The expense is approximately $155 for $1,000,000 of coverage.

There are a number of insurance companies providing wedding insurance in the U.S. Like to other types of insurance, the cost of wedding insurance depends on the cost of items and the amount of coverage. According to the American Wedding Association website, insurance claims can reach $175,000 for canceling or postponing wedding for various reasons, $1,500 for the photography or video accidents, or $10,500 for wedding dress problems. Both liability and property loss can each reach $1 million. The insurance can help reduce a couple’s worries and ensure an excellent wedding.


在美国举办婚礼可以隆重,也可以简约,没有攀比,量力而行。美国人没有结婚一定要买房的概念,男方更没有结婚前一定要准备婚房的压力。男人娶老婆、女人嫁老公不在乎是否门当户对。有房无房、有车无车更不是一对恋人是否结婚的决定因素。另外,即使父母的经济条件很不错,也很少会帮助子女买房。两人只要相爱,就可以组成家庭,很多年轻人刚结婚时都是租房住,婚后的生活就靠小两口自己去打拼,等夫妻两人奋斗几年,略攒了些钱,他们才会考虑在哪里置房安顿下来。
据美国婚礼协会的统计报告显示,美国人在婚礼上的花费平均为2.2万美元(约合人民币13.8万元),每年全美国民众在婚礼上的花费约为720亿美元。很多美国人喜欢选择在6月份举办婚礼,据说这与罗马神话有关:6月的英文是JUNE,源自罗马神话中主管爱情和婚姻的女神朱诺(JUNO)的名字,相爱的恋人们大都愿意在这个月份里喜结良缘。

与中国由男方主办婚礼的传统不一样,在美国,婚礼的费用由女方家庭负担。男方的花费主要是购买钻石戒指。美国人重视婚礼,所以在婚礼上的花费不薄,主要有:到教堂举行婚礼的场地费和主持人费500美元;婚礼宴会场地租用费2500美元;100人参加婚礼的餐费4000美元;照相2000美元;乐队花费1500美元,鲜花750美元;蛋糕500美元;结婚戒指5000美元;一件中档的婚纱约500-1200美元,几乎所有的新娘礼服都是买来的。在婚礼结束后,新娘会把礼服收藏起来,等到女儿出嫁的时候作为特别的礼物。美国人在婚宴上吃得较为简单。据统计,38%的婚礼是自助餐的形式,34%的婚礼是比较正式的宴会,还有28%的婚礼只提供蛋糕、饼干和饮料。美国的婚礼场面有大有小。富人的婚礼动辄花费上百万美元、上千万美元。如美国前总统克林顿在2010年7月31日为独女切尔西举办的婚礼,总花费在300万美元以上。

美国人送礼讲究实用,但都不会很昂贵。遇到朋友结婚,你若收到请帖,一般都要去参加婚礼。出席婚礼的宾客一般不直接送礼金,如果不知道对方需要什么样的礼物时,宾客可以到不同的商场购买礼券,这样就可以让新人自己到商场挑选喜欢的礼物。礼券的金额可根据自己的财力决定,若你手头实在拮据,送张贺卡也是可以的。

在美国较为普遍的一种做法是:当一对新人筹办婚礼,通常会在美国最大的“梅西百货公司”代办礼品,将他们喜欢的礼品放在商店电脑系统或网站上,然后通知前来参加结婚仪式的宾客在网站上挑他们想送的礼物。新婚夫妇会在婚礼请柬上注明,他们已在某百货公司或厨房用品店选好了喜欢的东西,并附上礼品单的网页。朋友在网页上看到礼品单后,根据自己和主人交往的深浅及自己的经济能力,来选择礼品。送礼人只要购买,姓名马上输入计算机,一个清单打出来,谁送了什么礼品,清清楚楚地列在表上。一般宾客送礼品或礼劵的数额大约100美元(约人民币630元)左右。

由于婚礼费用昂贵,越来越多的美国婚前男女都会认真地考虑举办婚礼时会发生的意外风险,譬如因一方婚前突然改变主意、父母家人干涉或遭遇极端恶劣天气等各种原因导致婚礼取消。为了防止和降低婚礼因故取消带来的损失,他们都会购买婚庆保险。投保的项目包括摄影、服装、礼物、戒指等,婚庆保险金额通常在155美元至550美元之间。如果投保100万美元婚庆事故险,费用在185美元左右。

目前,美国有多家保险公司提供婚庆保险。与其他类型的保险一样,婚庆保险的费用取决于承保项目和金额。据美国婚庆网站介绍,因故取消或推迟婚礼可索赔17.5万美元,摄影或视讯故障赔偿1500美元,结婚礼服出现问题可索赔1.05万美元,责任事故和财产损害赔偿则分别高达100万美元。这为即将步入婚姻殿堂的情侣减少了后顾之忧,确保婚礼办得尽善尽美。
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