Mike Pence and Chris Christie Give Lessons in How To Get Rich Losing Elections*

Published in Folha
(Brazil) on 7 June 2023
by Lúcia Guimarães (link to originallink to original)
Translated from by Jane Dorwart. Edited by Helaine Schweitzer.
Relaxed election laws in the U.S. make running as an underdog candidate good business.

If Mike Pence, Donald Trump’s vice president, gets elected president, I will die my hair green.

If Chris Christie, former governor of New Jersey, unseats Joe Biden in 2024, this tricolor Carioca (a person from Rio de Janeiro), promises to wear a Flamengo shirt for a week.**

This week, Pence and Christie expanded the roster of presidential candidates from the extremist cell, which still goes by the name of the Republican Party. Both are expected to lose and emerge financially victorious from the campaign.

Christie broke unpopularity records in 2018 when he left office as governor of the state separated from Manhattan by the Hudson River. He attacked Donald Trump, but was shortly licking his boots. Christie unsuccessfully sought a cabinet position and led the transition team, from which he was also later excluded. The humiliation wasn’t enough, however. In 2020, he almost died from COVID-19, which he caught while coaching Trump for the debate with Joe Biden.

Mike Pence, former governor of Indiana, was 12 meters (approximately 39 feet) from a mob that literally asked for his neck during the storming of the Capitol on Jan. 6, 2021. Since then, he has hardly spoken against the former president who continues to blame him for not helping him steal the election that day. Pence only criticized Trump more explicitly when he announced his presidential candidacy on Thursday.

The two former governors have something more in common than just a high rejection index among Republican voters. They both depend on the salary of public officials. Pence left the vice presidency only to be hosted by friends until his political connections were enough to buy a mansion in Indiana.

Campaign finance laws in the U.S., which the Supreme Court relaxed in a 2010 decision, provide presidential candidates guaranteed personal enrichment without having to commit a crime. With the help of creative accounting and a gutted federal agency left to monitor the electoral orange grove, any underdog can benefit from campaigns in a way that would make Wal do Açaí and many other Bolsonarian personages on the take blush.***

Someone who knew this but may have been too greedy, is the congressman son of Brazilians, George Santos. He is under federal indictment for using campaign donations to buy designer clothes and pay personal bills, which he denies, while to everyone’s surprise was elected to Congress in 2022. Santos has collected almost $3 million from donors, a large amount for an underdog in his district. But it’s no exception.

Tina Forte, an obscure Trumpist who was in the vicinity of the Capitol during the attack, ran for Congress in 2022 against the unbeatable locomotive Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. Miraculously, Forte raised and managed to spend more than $1.4 million in a stillborn campaign, but one that was lucrative for election service vendors such as a printers.

The Santos indictment also serves as a convenient distraction. New York Republicans got richer from donations to his campaign. The money that pours into political action committees known as super PACS brings campaign funding closer to being organized crime.

Neither Pence nor Christie will sit at the famous Resolute Desk the desk in the White House Oval Office in January 2025. But the rear ends of unpopular and cynical politicians like them will land in more comfortable seats, thanks to the big business of running in U.S. elections.

*Editor’s note: The original version of this article in Portuguese is available with a subscription.

**Translator note: The Sports Club with three colors would be Fluminense, one of four major football teams in Rio de Janeiro and the oldest football club in Rio. Flamengo, another popular club, has two colors.

***Translator note: The author is referring to Walderice da Conceição who was Bolsonaro's secretary in the Chamber for 15 years but, according to a lawsuit, was never in Brasília or held a government position.




Mike Pence e Chris Christie dão aulas de como ficar rico perdendo eleições
Leis eleitorais afrouxadas nos EUA tornam candidaturas de políticos

Se Mike Pence, o ex-vice de Donald Trump, for eleito presidente, prometo pintar meu cabelo de verde.


Se Chris Christie, o ex-governador de New Jersey, derrotar Joe Biden em 2024, esta tricolor carioca se compromete a vestir a camisa do Flamengo por uma semana.
Pence e Christie engrossaram, nesta semana, o bloco de pré-candidatos à Presidência pela célula extremista que ainda atende pelo nome de Partido Republicano. Ambos devem perder e sair financeiramente vitoriosos da campanha.

Christie batia recorde de impopularidade quando deixou, em 2018, o governo do estado separado de Manhattan pelo rio Hudson. Atacou Trump, mas logo passou a lamber suas botas. Pediu um ministério, foi rejeitado, liderou a equipe de transição, da qual também foi defenestrado. Mas a humilhação não bastou. Em 2020, quase morreu de Covid, contraída ao treinar Donald Trump para o debate com Joe Biden.

Mike Pence, que governou o estado de Indiana, esteve a 12 metros da turba que pedia literalmente seu pescoço durante a invasão do Capitólio em 6 de janeiro de 2021. Desde então, mal denunciou o ex-chefe que continuou colocando a culpa nele por não ter roubado a eleição naquele dia. Só criticou Trump de maneira mais explícita quando anunciou a pré-candidatura, nesta quarta-feira.

Os dois ex-governadores têm em comum mais do que um alto índice de rejeição entre eleitores republicanos. Ambos dependeram do salário de funcionários públicos. Pence saiu da Vice-Presidência para se hospedar com amigos até as conexões políticas valerem uma renda para comprar uma mansão em Indiana.


As leis de financiamento de campanha nos EUA, afrouxadas com uma decisão da Suprema Corte em 2010, tornam as candidaturas políticas uma garantia de enriquecimento pessoal sem necessariamente cometer crimes.

Com ajuda de contabilidade criativa e uma agência federal esvaziada para monitorar o laranjal eleitoral, qualquer azarão pode se beneficiar de campanhas que fariam corar a Wal do Açaí e tantos outros personagens das rachadinhas bolsonarianas.


Um que sabia disso, mas pode ter ido com muita fome ao pote, é o deputado filho de brasileiros George Santos. Ele está sob indiciamento federal por usar doações da campanha para comprar roupas de grife e pagar contas pessoais —o que ele nega— quando, para surpresa geral, elegeu-se para o Congresso em 2022. Santos recolheu quase US$ 3 milhões de doadores, uma quantia bastante alta para um azarão no seu distrito. Mas não é uma exceção.

Tina Forte, trumpista obscura que estava nas imediações do Capitólio durante a invasão, concorreu a deputada, em 2022, contra a locomotiva imbatível Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. Milagrosamente, Forte arrecadou e conseguiu gastar mais de US$ 1,4 milhão numa campanha natimorta, mas lucrativa para vendedores de serviços eleitorais como gráficas.
..
O indiciamento de George Santos serve também como distração conveniente. Republicanos de Nova York lucraram com doações da campanha dele. O dinheiro que jorra para os comitês de ação política conhecidos como "super PACs" aproxima o financiamento de campanhas do crime organizado.

Nem Pence nem Christie hão de se sentar à famosa Resolute Desk, a escrivaninha do Salão Oval na Casa Branca em janeiro de 2025. Mas os traseiros de políticos impopulares e cínicos como eles vão aterrissar em assentos mais confortáveis, graças ao grande negócio que é concorrer em eleições nos EUA.
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