Law, Love and Politics in Equal Marriage

Why the contrast?

There are three main reasons: law, love and politics. In order to transform any basic social institution, such as marriage, it is essential to alter the rules of the game that govern it (the law), the power relations among the affected groups (politics), and perceptions and emotions (love, hate, fear and so on) that citizens have over it. Although each of these moves is significant in itself, they only become permanent when taken together.

In Colombia, the first wave of the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender movement has had a significant impact on the law. The Constitutional Court has given historic rulings that have changed the lives of many same-sex couples in cases litigated by organizations such as Colombia Diversa and Dejusticia. In this, the situation resembles that of the U.S. Various state courts, like in California, have endorsed gay marriage and the Supreme Court will no doubt abolish a discriminatory law from 1996 that defines marriage as a union between a man and a woman.

But the similarities end there. In the U.S., changes in the law have gone hand-in-hand with political victories. The rights that the Supreme Court is close to confirming are a result of two decades of street marches, parliamentary lobbies and strategies to mobilize LGBT voters. It was this mobilization that led to the recognition of same-sex marriage in New York and eight other states. That is why Obama spoke out in defense of equal marriage last year, Hillary and Bill Clinton just did the same and Republican congressmen and congresswomen are even queuing up to announce to the world that they have had a change of heart.

In Colombia, the LGBT movement has been just as successful in the tribunals as it has been ignored in Congress and in the polls. The presence of the movement and its allies is not being felt with the necessary force in the streets, in political parties or in Congress to counter the powerful lobby of the churches and other conservative sectors. Hence the Constitutional Court’s ruling ordering legislation on equal marriage by June at the latest. Almost no member of Congress acknowledges it for the simple reason that indifference is not politically costly.

Ultimately, however, the adoption of equal marriage depends on perceptions and emotions: What do we feel when we see two men affectionately holding hands in the street? How do we react when two women who love each other share a kiss? What happened in the U.S. shows that there is nothing more effective than affection when it comes to changing opinions on this topic. The experience of having a family member, a friend or a close colleague who is gay or lesbian can make all the difference. When the LGBT movement got hundreds of thousands of people who were suffering in silence to come out of the closet — including children of politicians who make the decisions — their opinions were turned around. Today, the percentage of people in favor and against equal marriage — 58 percent versus 36 percent — are the opposite of what they were just seven years ago.

The right to not be discriminated against can only take root when it passes from the courts to Congress, and from there to family life, to conversations among friends and working relationships. After all, equal marriage is not a product of law and politics alone, but, above all, of love.