God — Carson’s name is now officially associated with God and the familiar legend of the seven prosperous years. Most people have experienced the seven lean years and are still waiting for the fulfillment of the biblical prophecy that seven years of failure will be followed by seven years of success. But thus it is written, and blessed be he who believes. And Ben Carson believes. He’s a strict Catholic* and is the Republican presidential candidate — according to the latest polls — with better prospects then Donald Trump. Lately, he’s been famous for saying not particularly intelligent things, such as his observation that he would send all Syrian refugees back to their homeland after he became president because Syrian refugees were all potential Islamic State warriors — precisely the people from whom the refugees have been fleeing in the first place. And let’s leave Trump to his own beliefs; what’s more significant is that there are so many Americans who are subject matter experts in the various African regions: Trump on Syria, George W. Bush on Africa as a whole — he once referred to the continent as “a nation that suffers from incredible disease” — and now Ben Carson on Egypt.
This Ben Carson has now given his expert opinion on the famous pyramids at Giza. After all, why should they remain a mystery right in the middle of a presidential election? Maybe he wants to enlist God’s help in drumming up more votes.
Ben Carson has doubled down on his theory that the pyramids, despite all scientific knowledge, weren’t constructed as burial chambers for the pharaohs at all, but rather to serve as grain silos. Joseph, whose jealous brothers sold him into Egyptian slavery, later in his prosperous years used them to store his grain. Holy Moses! Ben Carson got this from the Old Testament, a source that’s really well known for its truthfulness and accuracy. Possibly, he even consulted with Indiana Jones, another pyramid expert. With precipitous theories like that, Carson will no doubt attract millions of votes, and if that puts him ahead of Donald Trump, the world will be better off. Of course, the world would be best off if neither Carson nor Trump got to be president with their primitive ideas. This world has other worries right now, such as the Old Testament edict “an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.” The New Testament disclaimed that old postulate long ago.
But how would Carson and Trump know that?
*Editor’s Note: Ben Carson is not Catholic, but rather belongs to the Seventh-Day Adventist Church.
The Old Testament speaks of seven years of success (great crops) followed by seven years of failure (famine). Not the other way around.