Trump for the Charlemagne Prize!
Published in Die Tageszeitung
(Germany) on 28 May 2025
by Bernd Müllender (link to original)
EU Commission President Ursula von der Leyen is receiving the Charlemagne Prize — how boring. Donald Trump would have deserved it more. He has brought the European states closer together.
As is customary, the International Charlemagne Prize of the city of Aachen will be presented this Thursday on Ascension Day. According to the statutes, it is awarded to an individual who has made a significant contribution to European unity. The key, as ever, is to ensure that the recipient is a prominent figure to attract a lot of precious attention and buzz to the city. This year, Ursula von der Leyen is receiving the award.
The choice of the EU Commission president is as boring as it is wrong. Sarcasm alert: Only one person deserves the prize in 2025, and that person is Donald Trump. Nobody has done more for Europe's unity than the blond buffoon. He has brought about brand-new coalitions, revived defensive alliances and strengthened our European economy and the euro with his tariff antics. Europe's capital markets are booming.
Trump unites us all — Germans, Bulgarians, Sicilians and Finns alike are coming together to collectively mock the president. At the same time, seeing the supposedly most powerful man in the world behave so erratically is teaching us to accept our own lack of a plan from day to day. Trump is even making us appreciate our sketchiest politicians. He has fundamentally altered our view of the failing state that is the U.S. What’s more, dubious Chinese online retailers such as Temu have been weakened, and our sense of solidarity with countries we sympathize with, like Greenland and Canada, has been strengthened, while Tesla has been downsized in favor of Daimler AG.* Great job, Donald! MEGA — Make Europe Great Again.
Perhaps von der Leyen will pull out of the award ceremony overnight, while the madman from Washington covertly rushes to Aachen, driven by his ego. He knows his way around the region. After all, he once stated that “Belgium is a beautiful city.” A fitting statement now might be, “Aachen is a great continent.” The people of Printenstadt, Aachen's informal nickname, would be bursting with pride. Alternatively, there's always 2026. Europe's power will have further solidified by then, making Trump an even more appropriate recipient of the award. Provided, of course, that his puppy, Elon Musk, hasn't canned the presidential bureaucracy and the White House with his DOGE crusade by then, declaring it unnecessary bullshit.
*Editor’s Note: On Feb. 1, 2022, Daimler AG, formerly the parent company of Mercedes-Benz, changed its name to Mercedes-Benz Group AG.
As is customary, the International Charlemagne Prize of the city of Aachen will be presented this Thursday on Ascension Day. According to the statutes, it is awarded to an individual who has made a significant contribution to European unity. The key, as ever, is to ensure that the recipient is a prominent figure to attract a lot of precious attention and buzz to the city. This year, Ursula von der Leyen is receiving the award.
The choice of the EU Commission president is as boring as it is wrong. Sarcasm alert: Only one person deserves the prize in 2025, and that person is Donald Trump. Nobody has done more for Europe's unity than the blond buffoon. He has brought about brand-new coalitions, revived defensive alliances and strengthened our European economy and the euro with his tariff antics. Europe's capital markets are booming.
Trump unites us all — Germans, Bulgarians, Sicilians and Finns alike are coming together to collectively mock the president. At the same time, seeing the supposedly most powerful man in the world behave so erratically is teaching us to accept our own lack of a plan from day to day. Trump is even making us appreciate our sketchiest politicians. He has fundamentally altered our view of the failing state that is the U.S. What’s more, dubious Chinese online retailers such as Temu have been weakened, and our sense of solidarity with countries we sympathize with, like Greenland and Canada, has been strengthened, while Tesla has been downsized in favor of Daimler AG.* Great job, Donald! MEGA — Make Europe Great Again.
Perhaps von der Leyen will pull out of the award ceremony overnight, while the madman from Washington covertly rushes to Aachen, driven by his ego. He knows his way around the region. After all, he once stated that “Belgium is a beautiful city.” A fitting statement now might be, “Aachen is a great continent.” The people of Printenstadt, Aachen's informal nickname, would be bursting with pride. Alternatively, there's always 2026. Europe's power will have further solidified by then, making Trump an even more appropriate recipient of the award. Provided, of course, that his puppy, Elon Musk, hasn't canned the presidential bureaucracy and the White House with his DOGE crusade by then, declaring it unnecessary bullshit.
*Editor’s Note: On Feb. 1, 2022, Daimler AG, formerly the parent company of Mercedes-Benz, changed its name to Mercedes-Benz Group AG.
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